Why's love so hard?

Why'd it have to turn out this way?

Will I ever trust a single thing you do or say?

Or believe where you say you've been?

You can turn the pages forward and never look back.

You can forgive but you can never forget.

So many promises broken over again.

I need some time to heal -

Some time to feel -

Some time to see -

Some time to be.

c. 2002

RENEWING VOWS

A spontaneous thought came to me to find my first love. I had no idea where he was. I googled his name but nothing. Then I tried his brothers name and the 4th one I tried calling I got lucky and had them call my love to see if he would see me. The first time was a quick lunch and a walk through our wedding album. And now its the beginning of a new romance. I love him now more than I did when we were first married. What a sad mistake we made getting divorced. It's saddens me so much to think of what we could of had. I pray everyday we find our way back to each other in time. On 9/4/11 at 4:00pm we mentally renewed our vows to each other. Sounds weird I know but we pre-set the time and and date and when it came we got married again on the inside. My heart and soul with always belong to you my love. 143 4ever....

Sittin' in a corner of time

Just thinkin'

Dreamin'
Where could Fordie be?

The Tango

God sent this man to me, I truly believe this. When I met my now husband of almost 18 years it was a WOW moment. Pretty on the eyes, easy to talk to and liked to have fun. I met him at a beautiful restaurant bar that was walking distance to my home and also where my girlfriend was the Hostess. The restaurant was named "The Raindancer." The bar was upstairs with a beautiful fireplace and bookshelves; a place to feel comfortable by yourself. He started coming in as he knew the bartender and lived on the same street as me. It was fall in South Florida with the holidays approaching. We'd meet and hang out and went to a few other bars to hear some music. We decided to have our first official date on New Years Eve.


The was it. I never went home again after New Years Eve. We went 93 days straight making love. (I use to tease the women I worked with every day when I'd come in in the morning with the count. They were mortified. Too much information they'd say! I just like to make them laugh)


We lived together for a year and a half, went on a three week vacation in a rented RV from Las Vegas to Colorado, covering 13 National Parks, hiking to the bottom of the Grand Canyon and back up. We did whitewater down the Colorado River and just had a great time. When we got back to Vegas we stayed at the "Golden Nugget," rented a gold Cadillac limo and went to the Drive-Up window at "The Little White Chapel" and Reverend Charlotte Richards married us in our blue-jean cut-offs. It was perfect fun.........


We've traveled, hiked, biked, whitewatered, raced, camped, RV'd, utraglided - and keep on having fun.


We've had our ups and downs but we made a pact that NO ONE LEAVES....it's ok to get mad, but get over it.  Grit the Rose between your teeth.......and Tango...


Now getting older I don't know what we'd do without the other. Our 2 brains make 1 whole thought.


Thank you, Jesus, for this precious gift.....

The Tap Dance

In between my first and second marriages I did a tap dance of sorts with a very special friend. He was my best friend and got me through many problems in my life. He was a good listener and a great hangout friend. A relationship wasn't in the cards for us, just good company and comfort when I needed it. Most guys wouldn't understand this kind of relationship. But in today's world men and women are just friends without attachment all the time. Thanks PC You'll always be my BFF as far as a guy goes.

The Stumbling 2 Step

What was I thinking? When my now second ex-husband asked me to marry him one Friday morning before he went golfing I said no. When he came back after a quick 9 holes, I said yes and we went down to the courthouse in Delray Beach, FL and got married. He then went back to playing golf for the rest of the afternoon. On Sunday he flew up to Altanta to go back to work. Like I said, what was I thinking? Much more on this stumbling 2 step later. He was an abuser mentally and physically. What was I thinking?

Wedding Dance

How ironic, I've been married three times and today would have been my 38th Anniversary if I was still married to my first husband, my high school sweetheart. I often wonder where he is and how he's doing. I do try to stay in touch, but it's been several years since our last contact. Our dance was a great first love story with a bittersweet ending. I hope some day we find each other again. He is still the love of my life. This kind of love doesn't come along very often.  My dreams still feature his face more often than any other person in my life. Happy Anniversary Flapper.I love you wherever you are....